You're in the arms of your angel, may you find some comfort there.

14 October 2009, 14:39

I don’t know why I’m writing this blog as normally celebrity deaths don’t register too high up my list of priorities. Certainly the Jackson death circus passed me by and got quite tedious by about day 3. However, absolute shock is the only way I can describe what I felt when I saw the headline on Sunday morning. It wasn’t as if I knew him, but in a way we did, I think we feel that way about all Irish celebrities that have made it big outside of Ireland. Our outward showing is to treat such success with cynicism and begrudgery but inwardly I think we are pleased when one of our own does well.
Also, all of boyzone seemed so normal like any other kids you see on the streets, or maybe there marketing machine did a really good job of making appear so.

Even now there is still a little bit of disbelief, and a lot as been written over the last few days about Stephen, but all of it seems heartfelt and weirdly even seems genuine, which is not usually the case where so called Friends are trotted out to give tributes after a death. Watching Andrew Lloyd Webber, you would swear that he had lost a family member; even Louis seems to really be upset. But they all knew him so why has it had such an effect on everyone else. Is it that rocks stars are supposed to die that way or bad boy actors who live by the creed of live fast, die young and leave a good looking corpse. Boyband members are supposed to just grow old and maybe have the decency to look embarrassed when there past is put before them.

I’m sure there are plenty of people who will admit that they fancied Stephen, but how many will admit that they still do. I’ve always had a soft spot for Stephen. I remember whe I first came out back in 1993/94, and boyzone was just becoming famous, every second person you met had a story about a liason they had with Stephen. I was stunned where a 17/17 yo boy got the time for all that malarkey but I suppose it was the easter rising effect all over again, a sin if you were to believe every story you were told about “their granddad” being in the GPO it would have numbered the amount of Irish revolutionaries in the millions.

So Stephen coming out wasn’t such a big deal I suppose among the Dublin gays who were already out and on their way to vewing such coming out stories with a jaundiced and jaded eye. So the full impact of the effect it was having on others may have been missed. Granted he wasn’t the first to ever step out of the closet. But certainly he was the first “entertainment” celebrity to come out, no I thinks it obligatory for a band to have at least one gay member. Maybe it was his coming out which meant they we felt like we knew him, that he had shared that aspect with us, and so we were connected

I’ll finish with my own little memory of Stephen, Its not salacious or one which I can sell to the tabloids, however it’s a story I’ve told before but It means more to me now that sadly he is gone.

It was back on a dark night in late 1993 or early 1994. I know it was winter because it was dark and it was cold. It was an age before mobile phone were common and if you were out in the street and you needed to contact someone then you had to use a public phone. Anyway I found my self in such a call box and as I dialled, my eyes met the eyes of the person in the other phone box. We carried out our respective conversations but all the while looking at each other. It wasn’t a long connection, but I don’t think I had come out yet, and it was the early days of boyzone, I suppose we were too scared to take it further or at least I know I was,, but the memory of that evening still stays with me. There is an addendum to that story, A few years later, I was walking down grafton street and I saw Stephen walking up towards me. Our eyes met again locked as he passed I looked back and I saw that he was looking back as well. I just smiled an continued on my way… So that’s my Stephen Story… I never said it was going to be a good story, but it is what it is.

Stephen Gately 17 march 1976- 10 Oct 2009
RIP

Cheezypuf 14 October 2009 @ 18:27 That's a nice Stephen story. He seems to have touched many of us. Out of respect I'll refrain from repeating any of the other Stephen stories I've heard.

44paul 15 October 2009 @ 19:23 I remember when he came out first, some stupid comedian made the remarks that he broke a contract with his teeny girl fans, he said that now that he's gay the fantasy is over for them. Boybands although they enjoy a huge gay following, it was usually the teenage girls that got the oxygen of the publicity they needed, to hit the early bigtime. I don't know which come first, the teen girls or the gays to make a successful boyband I suspect the girls do. So is was a courageous thing Louis Walsh done to admit Stephen Gately into Boyzone, I am sure he had other options. But the lad looked good and had a nice voice so he selected him. I am not into celebs and I have no interest in their lives. But I do get that from all I am hearing about him now, the salt of the Earth, down to Earth, comfortable in his own skin, a class a human being. So RIP Stephen Gately. A well written piece I enjoyed that. I never had a Stephen Gately moment but I did have a Keith Duffy moment. Nothing salubrious though

Wheelie Bin 17 October 2009 @ 13:06 Great blog. Well done.

Ayla 19 October 2009 @ 02:21 What a lovely blog Efferal. Thank you.