First the feeling you have is because you had a arguement with your mother and thats what hurts, not because your Gay or what was said, you feel sad because you were fighting with the one you love, and now you want to hurt her by you commiting suicide, that is a stupid selfish thought, and you gain nothing,
Build a bridge and get over it !!!!!! So you are gay or you think you are, so what half the people out there are gay, men and women alike so join the club, what do you want special treatment, its your fault that you do not make an effort to mix, get off your arse and go make friends, in this world there is always someone for someone, no matter how ugly or reserved they are, and what is ugly, you sure you are ugly, or is it you have not found the right person that see's the beauty in you and tells you so.
So first go for a walk a serious walk, feel fresh and good, and go out to where you will meet other people they do not have to be gay, maybe you will be lucky that then right person male or female may come along that will be a good friemd or even a lover, but get out and even find your own place,
So dont blame your mother for the arguement, think !!!was it your own doing, or lack of doing,
So get out there and make a life, not take the easy way and cowards way out.
x x x x x x life is what you make...... it not yours to take it