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23 And Dis-illusioned?!
# 1 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 16:30
Anyone else feel the same? Sorry to be a little depressing!! Best friend going out with my ex....people only want a shag on the scene.....don't get me wrong it is so great to know the scene and be friends with ppl on it but so hard to make real friends that do not become just "pub" friends....not looking for MAGIC!! just some fun without that meaning a shag!!
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# 2 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 16:39
Can it really be that bad at 23?

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# 3 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 16:43
thats the problem with guys coming out so young these days they get disilusioned with the scene by the time they are 23

well in my day you wouldn't start getting disilusioned till you where at least 26

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# 4 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 16:46
Then of course, in the gay world, at 30 life ends.
Over the hill.

Or at least I keep hearing such rumours....

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# 5 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 16:58
just turned 30th and have yet to be caught by the gay "Logan's Run" type police and carted away
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# 6 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 17:00
I'm 27 and I have always found it difficult to make the kind of friends you're looking for. However I have managed to do just that so keep trying. I go with the "treat others as you want to be treated" attitude.

Not all guys are looking for a shag on the scene!
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# 7 : Wednesday 3-9-2003 @ 19:13
Interesting that the same thing you describe only happened to me two years ago (I'm 36). Not because I have been bouncing around the scene since forever in gay bliss. I always found the scene to be very incompatible with the way I look at the world so I almost never went out on the scene. I met two great guys and had two great relationships but neither were on the scene. I moved to the States and found people who were just like me and became part of a community of gay snowboarders and skiers.

I came back and thought..OK, well if I can have that there..why not here, and so I trawled the scene for 2 years in search of like minded people.

The thing that struck me is that Irish Queers seem to suffer from neo-colonialism twice over. As a nation we have an inferiority complex (I don't buy that celtic tiger crap..it'll take a jungle's worth to deal with our inferiority complex), and as queers we're only now really crawling into the light..10 years of decriminatisatiion is a short time culturally and so we find it very hard to form a real community..as distinct from a loose association based on sex and booze. Many people are suspicious, paranoid and bitchy..mostly from having been crushed by the roman catholic education machine. There are people who enjoy bitching and the like but I detest it.. I think its terribly destructive.

In the end I decided to do something which would foster community, and so I'm ploughing my energies into the Emerald Warriors Rugby Club. When people come together with a common goal and focus then community and fraternity is fostered. I figure that if we take out our frustrations on the pitch, we won't need to take lumps out of each other off the pitch. Besides... imagine the satisfaction of beating our first straight team mmmmmsweeet!!...I digress.

Boxfresh, I understand your predicament and can I gently suggest that it is better to light a candle than damn the darkness. There are other non-pub/club centred activities out there grab one or start one and good luck...


You wouldn't be handy with a ball by any chance?

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# 8 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 09:50
P. Bear......

Used to play basketball with the under 20's Irish Team - then hit college and that went out the window! Only ball I'm good with!
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# 9 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 11:01
Fair 'nuff
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# 10 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 17:48
I am 23 also Boxfresh. This is real life, and it is short. So enjoy it while you can. Make sure you will not be 83 looking back regretting not taking chances or opportunities. Learn by mistakes and whatever happens, good or bad, it all goes in the big book of your autobiography. Make sure yours is a page-turner!

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# 11 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 18:14
don't get me wrong - a shag is great (well...it depends) but sometimes you do look for more - a quiet drink, someone to go to the cinema with. 23 too btw
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# 12 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 18:19
23.....really....hmmm that's interesting. So where you based? Got Msn Messenger?

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# 13 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 18:22
I'm based in Waterford. Use college comp system they block prety much all the message systems!

but email me on here and I'll give u my number if ud like?
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# 14 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 18:23
cool.....my mail is olop555@hotmail.com
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# 15 : Thursday 4-9-2003 @ 18:27
you got mail!
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