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Breaking Wind Etiquette
 
# 1 : Tuesday 25-10-2011 @ 20:22
 
 
What is your etiquette for passing gas?

Does it vary in function of the "fart pattern"?
Or do you deal with them all in the same way?
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# 2 : Tuesday 25-10-2011 @ 20:23
 
 
Apparently some people start a thread every time they do it.
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# 3 : Tuesday 25-10-2011 @ 20:24
 
 
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# 4 : Tuesday 25-10-2011 @ 20:26
 
 
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# 5 : Tuesday 25-10-2011 @ 21:31
 
 
Look what you started Blah
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# 6 : Tuesday 25-10-2011 @ 21:33
 
 
And
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# 7 : Wednesday 26-10-2011 @ 00:03
 
 
No need to blow caution to the wind,if a cork or an exhaust pipe is not readily available,charcoal tablets will stop the gas exploding from your Ass.
Be like Demis,embrace your back door breeze.
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# 8 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 08:17
 
 
A nice soft seeper on the Luas is your only man.

Was sitting beside an auld wan on a recent trip to Dublin and just before Dundrum she lifted up her adjoining ass cheek and shot a right meaty rasper into seat.

Not a frikken bother on her.

Luckily i was getting off at Dundrum
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# 9 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 08:57
 
 
When I get to that age I will stand up and fart in young people's faces.
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# 10 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 09:37
 
 
Someone said :
Apparently some people start a thread every time they do it.


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# 11 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 20:21
 
 
Someone said :
When I get to that age I will stand up and fart in young people's faces.

Dirty thing, don't eat turnips maam, give the young ones a break.
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# 12 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 21:28
 
 
This all depends on where and when
If at a social event.
1: Cough loudly, or attract attention some other way; if at a formal dinner gently tap your glass
2: Give a short speech extoling the virtues of behaving in a natural manner rather than conforming to social norms.
3: If you talk loudly enough the sound of this speech will mask the sound of your fart.
On Public transport, or in shops
1: Fart as normal, do not adjust buttocks in any noticeable way
2: Regardless of sound or odour or absence of either, give a disapproving look at the person sitting nearest you.
At work
As for social situations above, though you may need to check your workplace regulations to ensure that short speeches are allowed. If speeches are not allowed behave as for public transport.
Friends and Family events.
Proceed as normal, ask for marks out of ten for odour, sound and any special effects.
Finally, in churches, theatres, cinema or operas, silent or silent but deadlys must be ignored, if noise is anticipated time it to match a loud part of the service, play, film or opera. Either that or creak seat at the same time.
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# 13 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 21:45
 
 
If you stare ahead of you and breathe in through your nose it won't happen, provided you don't blink. It redirects the trapped wind into your lungs.
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# 14 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 22:04
 
 
Someone said :
It redirects the trapped wind into your lungs.

No. How could air trapped in your digestive system, at one end, enter the respiratory system? Last I checked, these were two completely separate systems?
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# 15 : Thursday 15-12-2011 @ 22:15
 
 
Someone said :
If you stare ahead of you and breathe in through your nose it won't happen, provided you don't blink. It redirects the trapped wind into your lungs.

Ah you're just talking out your arse on that one.
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