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Attached Guys Using Grindr
 
# 1 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 10:25
 
 
This topic of conversation came up with a friend the other day. He was telling me that his best mate split with his boyfriend of just over a year because they both found out the other was using Grindr. Drama central apparently.

Would you dump a guy if you discovered he was using Grindr to hook up with other guys ?
If you are in a relationship yourself, do you use Grindr to chat / make friends with other guys?

Discuss...
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# 2 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 10:29
 
 
Well the first I heard of grindr was on here a few days ago. (Seriously out of the loop on all things gay/hook-up) Firstly just because its on the phone doesn't mean it's being used(playing devils advocate I know) Secondly same as with any other scenario boyfriend cheats = dumpsville, population him. Personally I haven't used it & I guess considering where I live the minute I do install it the thing would overload, it's a little like gay central here.
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# 3 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 10:34
 
 
I've met a few guys off it, and one guy in particular has become a good pal of mine.

Another friend of mine is on it. He has been in a relationship for over 4 years now, bought a house together and all that, and he is actively on Grindr and gaydar also. Pictures there for all to see too. Not for a second do i think he is cheating, but he also dosnt advertise the fact that he is "partnered" and is looking for chat/ friends only.
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# 4 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 11:06
 
 
see thats the thing though you have chat friends and "chat friends". What does it say about his relationship though or how much he values it. They have bought a house, been together for 4 years yet he hides his relationship on sites like grindr or gaydar.

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# 5 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 11:26
 
 
It's not my place to say that to him, but it did get me wondering. For all I know they may have an open relationship.

I see loads of profiles on Grindr with the guys saying they are attached. Some say open relationship, others say just looking for friends, chat etc. I guess it is the guys own business at the end of the day. I can't help but think if you are on Grindr, no matter what your relationship status is, yer looking for yer hole
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# 6 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 11:31
 
 
Grindr is just the new chatroom. Back in the day when chatrooms were popular I used them to chat. Not to have cybersex or to hook up or to swap pics. Just to chat.

I'm in a relationship and use Grindr to chat. Granted, most people are looking just for sex but there are loads that just want to pass a few minutes on a bus and have a chat.

I have my relationship status pretty clearly stated in my profile and I say that I'm just looking for chat but the most annoying thing is when someone ignores it or assumes they can convince you to cheat on your partner. One time, this guy popped up and offered a BJ. I said that I was in a happy, healthy long term relationship. He replied 'So am I. But do you want a BJ?' I told him to fuck right off and blocked him.
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# 7 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 11:36
 
 
Someone said :
Grindr is just the new chatroom. Back in the day when chatrooms were popular I used them to chat. Not to have cybersex or to hook up or to swap pics. Just to chat.

I'm in a relationship and use Grindr to chat. Granted, most people are looking just for sex but there are loads that just want to pass a few minutes on a bus and have a chat.

I have my relationship status pretty clearly stated in my profile and I say that I'm just looking for chat but the most annoying thing is when someone ignores it or assumes they can convince you to cheat on your partner. One time, this guy popped up and offered a BJ. I said that I was in a happy, healthy long term relationship. He replied 'So am I. But do you want a BJ?' I told him to fuck right off and blocked him.

Some guys don't seem to take no for an answer and just simply ignore the fact that you are in a relationship. It's like selective hearing but in written format. The block function on both Grindr and Gaydar is great. It weeds out the timewasters and idiots
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# 8 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 11:38
 
 
I’ve never used it but I’ve always considered Grindr to be in the same class as Gaydar – it’s a dating and / or hook-up site ONLY. Granted that people can become friends through them too, but I would be concerned if I was in a relationship and learned that my partner was using either. I would also question the new world definition of “friend” or “chat” given countless experiences of looking at profiles on here only to find that the people are in relationships and looking for a bit of discreet fun. I don’t do this “open relationship” malarkey either - some of us would be happy to have one partner.
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# 9 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 13:09
 
 
Someone said :
“open relationship” malarkey either - some of us would be happy to have one partner.

I wouldn't consider it either. But what comes to my mind on the subject is if you are in an open relationship what is it that is not being fulffilled in the relationship that requires it to be open?
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# 10 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 13:20
 
 
I think it's all down to trust really. If you can't trust your partner when he says that he's just chatting or making mates on it, then your relationship really isn't up to much.
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# 11 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 17:46
 
 
I would.
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# 12 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 17:59
 
 
I think there is a massive difference between using something like the message boards on Gaire to chat/look for friends and using sites like Gaydar or apps like Grindr. If my partner was using the excuse they had it only for chat then id probably laugh at them.
You dont go to a strip bar just to have a pint, especially if there are plenty of pubs around you.
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# 13 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 18:09
 
 
I went on Grindr just now and of the 24 or so people near me, I counted 10 that said they're just looking for chat or mates. I chat regularly with one of them so I know he's genuine. So you can't really compare it to a strip club when nearly half the people seem to be going in for a drink. Granted it was set up for hook-ups but not everyone uses it for that.

Gaydar/Manhunt on the other hand I would have questions over. Grindr is easy. You go on it, chat for a few minutes and log off. It's really just texting. But web profiles take work and input. I know the last time I was on Gaydar chat almost two years ago, all you ever got was 'Dublin CC, 50 for 20 yo'. You don't have that on Grindr. There's something more open and honest about it. It's difficult to have multiple accounts for starters. And then if you don't like someone, it's only one tap to block them.
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# 14 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 18:53
 
 
I don't care whether a man is attached or not when I go to bed with him because I find it very hard to get laid and have to take what is on offer. In fact I'm flattered, because it signifies a measure of acceptance by a higher status man. I've been with 2 married men, 1 attached gay man (but I didn't know that until I accidentally told his bf), and 1 who said he 'used to be married'. I don't expect I will ever be attached, so this is going to have to do.
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# 15 : Wednesday 6-6-2012 @ 18:56
 
 
Someone said :
because it signifies a measure of acceptance by a higher status man.

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