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Bad Joke Thread
 
# 151 : Monday 19-8-2019 @ 15:29
 
 
"Someone stole my antidepressants. Whoever they are, I hope they're happy"..

"A cowboy asked me if I could help him round up 18 cows. I said, 'Yes, of course. - That's 20 cows'"..

"To be or not to be a horse rider, that is Equestrian"..

"I keep randomly shouting out 'Broccoli' and 'Cauliflower' - I think I might have florets"..

Some beauties from this years Fringe top ten..
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# 152 : Tuesday 20-8-2019 @ 04:55
 
 
I had a sore neck for years.
Very painful.
Years and years, I saw all kinds of specialists. GPs, Chiropractors, posture specialists.

Then a surgeon wrote to me about fusing the vertebrae in my neck. I signed up the procedure, got it done, and I haven't looked back since.
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# 153 : Wednesday 21-8-2019 @ 22:05
 
 
"On her deathbed, my granny said "I wish i'd bought a different type of bed"."
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# 154 : Sunday 1-9-2019 @ 00:26
 
 
Who is the presenter of TV's "Question Time"?
Mr P. Zenter!
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# 155 : Monday 10-2-2020 @ 00:03
 
 
What’s the difference between a dead baby and a granola bar?
500 Calories
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# 156 : Monday 10-2-2020 @ 09:03
 
 
Bono and Larry, walk into a bar and thebar person says, Not U2 again?
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# 157 : Sunday 23-2-2020 @ 10:34
 
 
He visited Irak and Iran : that’s when he won the marathon ...
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# 158 : Monday 24-2-2020 @ 08:36
 
 
A school teacher asks her class for a sentence containing the word “ contagious “. The only hand that goes up is bad Johnny at the back. Reluctantly the teacher says “ go on then.
Johnny proceeds “ My dad saw our neighbour painting his house with a 2” brush. He said it was going to take the contagious “.
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# 159 : Monday 24-2-2020 @ 08:39
 
 
Most gay men are born that way. The rest just get sucked into it.
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# 160 : Saturday 9-5-2020 @ 13:52
 
 
What does Pat the Baker have in common with the British Royal Family?

Their business is in bread.
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# 161 : Sunday 10-5-2020 @ 01:24
 
 
Someone said :
What does Pat the Baker have in common with the British Royal Family?

Their business is in bread.

My initial reaction was "Stop, you're killing me", but then I got it.
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# 162 : Sunday 10-5-2020 @ 09:35
 
 
Someone said :

My initial reaction was "Stop, you're killing me", but then I got it.

It took me 10 seconds of before i got it too..
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# 163 : Friday 20-11-2020 @ 17:31
 
 
Why did the lorry win the debate?

Because he was the most articulate.
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# 164 : Friday 20-11-2020 @ 19:34
 
 
A proton and a neutron walk into a bar, the neutron asks the proton "What do you want, I'm buying?" and the proton says "I'll just have a coke" and the neutron says "Are you sure?" and the proton replies "Yeah I'm positive"
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# 165 : Friday 20-11-2020 @ 22:23
 
 
FFS!
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