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Do We Just Become Nul..
 
# 1 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 00:58
 
 
A few months ago - I met this really nice guy online, we text loads, we talked loads on the phone, I thought the "real deal" but twice we failed to show... on a date.. he was looking for xxx I wasnt really looking for that but rather take it slowly... I gave him another chance but on date three he didnt show... the first tiime it was hurt, second time rejection and the third time it didnt matter

On another occassion after plucking up the courage sober to speak to a guy who was on his own in the G, he was cute found him very attractive and we had a lot in common, we laughed alot, I bought him a drink... I kissed him... we danced... it was an unplanned perfect date to be honest, than while getting me a drink at the bar, he started kissing this other guy, I felt hurt and up set by it all, I went up and said told him whisperiing in his ear to go fuck off with him self and walked away. He had no reaction just smiled and went back kissing the lad.

I was annoyed at my reaction - so after talkiing to some random girl about it who was with her brother haviing a drink, I decided to apologise for my reaction to this guy, my thinking was well I wouldnt do that on some one... I did apologise and this really pissed him off, really annoyed him, he trIED to tell me I didnt have too, I was right etc.

I was really up set by the whole thing - and annoyed, and didnt venture out for a while on the scene... I have learned that some times its just polite conversation and is just a kiss, or a grope and it is no more... it does toughen you up

Last night in Glitz I bumped into a friend of a friend and we got chatting - I had thought he was cute but perhaps I was not his type he asked who my type was and I pointed out some one on the dance floor, I asked who his type and he leaned into me getting closer, and we ended up kissing, bumpiing and grindiing on the dancefloor... it was lots of fun.

The next part I am not totally proud of as it was my 1st time to do this - he said follow me to the toilets, I followed, we groped we kissed, we bumped, groped, touched, kissed each others bodys, it was hot... he told me he wanted me, he wanted me inside of him, I told him I wasnt that guy, that despite this quick route for pleasure I had more respect for him than that, we left one after the other after several more passionate kisses... He said he founded it hot that I didnt take him.

than I was ignored on the dance floor, and he ended up getting off with another guy - the funny thing is I felt null, I didnt feel up set or annoyed, or happy nor did any of his gay friends say that was out of line they laughed.... do we just become null in the hunt for the nice genuine guy where there is a conncection and initial attraction ?
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# 2 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 01:22
 
 
Only speaking from a bi hetro prespective here, but quick sexy thing works for some but definitely not for all.
A bit of romance without sexy time is mighty nice too. Don't give up your dreams just because it's precivied as being uncool etc.
I'm Speaking after a few pints here so usual health warning applies
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# 3 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 01:25
 
 
cheers x thanks... whats Bi-Hetro?
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# 4 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 15:10
 
 
A few months ago - I met this really nice guy online, we text loads, we talked loads on the phone, I thought the "real deal"

You thought 'what' was the real deal??
You never even met the guy?
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# 5 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 15:30
 
 
Am I the only one thinking the first post is a wind up ?
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# 6 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 15:39
 
 
Someone said :
Am I the only one thinking the first post is a wind up ?

It's not a wind up, and I'd suggest people stick to giving advice please.

Clearly Lee is both shy and inexperienced. Taking things at a slow pace holding back sexually is no harm at all and sets you apart from most guys.
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# 7 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 15:41
 
 
I don’t think so. The OP is just relaying some personal experiences with men?

Why he let himself be stood up by the same guy three times, and then apologized for his reaction to another is beyond me
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# 8 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 15:43
 
 
I guess probably because he liked him. Some people can lose all sense when they are attracted to someone who couldn't care less about them.
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# 9 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 15:54
 
 
When you're very new to dating and meeting men and stuff it's easy to lose all perspective and take even the slightest display of interest as a lifelong commitment. I think Lee shared some very personal feelings and it sounds like he's learnt a bit from his experiences.
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# 10 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 16:13
 
 
Indeed. It takes a while to learn how to navigate these things and happens to people of all ages.
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# 11 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 16:21
 
 
I agree. It happens to us all. Every fella you kiss on a night out, you can't go around thinking "Oh he is gonna be my new fella"
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# 12 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 16:30
 
 
i empathise with Lee on the harsh realities of being shy and maybe vulneraable to wanting to believe that other guys would have the same attitude as him in looking for a slow relationship - but i have no doubt lee that your a very nice guy (dont know you) and i am sure there are plenty of guys out there who would be happy to take the same approach as yourself - dont give up .

on a sidenote - i do find it a bit strange that Lee seems to get a lot of sympathy and others like Fletcher seem to get mowed down for asking questions and seeking advice also - maybe a bit more consistency on the boards would be a bit more positive. i dont know either party but why treat one persons post for advice/insight different to another.
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# 13 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 16:48
 
 
Someone said :
I agree. It happens to us all. Every fella you kiss on a night out, you can't go around thinking "Oh he is gonna be my new fella"

That's something that has to be learnrd, sometimes the hard way. It's understandable to think so until you know different..no?
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# 14 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 16:54
 
 
people differ and for some when they find that someone is attracted to them and they have a need for someone in their lives - they can maybe overplay the situation and believe that 'this is it'. maybe it doesnt sound rational - but it is deffo a reality - i was there myself and fell in love (well in hindsight 'lust') but it was real at the time. someone had an interest in me - i was over the moon and maybe it was a boost to my low self esteem at the time. yea i learned the hard way - but some of us have to learn that way.
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# 15 : Thursday 6-12-2012 @ 16:56
 
 
Exactly.
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