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Dating Advice
 
# 1 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 13:11
 
 
Hi a few months ago I posted a topic re meeting new gay people as friends and since than I have joined http://www.meetup.com/dublin-international-gay-social/ with several great meets and had organised my 1st one last Thurs 13th of Dec..

Its all well and good - I have tried MH, gaydar, this site - nites out on the town.. I have had a few funny dates and meets - a friend said I should write a book .. but nothing real, no connection or them just wanting sex...

is there some where out there where I havent tried... I am hoping you can help that meet up group is great for friends... but hoping some in Gaireland might know of something amazing about dating ... that I havent tried...

cheers

lee
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# 2 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:02
 
 
What about wearing a fancy hat on one of your dates? Nothing too out there but something to really make your outfit *POP*.
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# 3 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:06
 
 
It sounds like you are actively looking for a relationship which is never wise. A relationship / boyfriend will come along when you least expect it.
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# 4 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:13
 
 
Someone said :
It sounds like you are actively looking for a relationship which is never wise. A relationship / boyfriend will come along when you least expect it.

I used to think that was bullshit but it really is true.
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# 5 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:20
 
 
Someone said :

I used to think that was bullshit but it really is true.

Oh same here. When I met my ex, a relationship was the last thing on my mind. Same with him, but we ended up having 5 ( mostly happy ) years together.
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# 6 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:22
 
 
Yea, love is pretty great. Sigh...
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# 7 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:24
 
 
Someone said :
Yea, love is pretty great. Sigh...

Happy sigh or sad sigh. ?
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# 8 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 14:51
 
 
Someone said :
It sounds like you are actively looking for a relationship which is never wise. A relationship / boyfriend will come along when you least expect it.

Can't stress this point enough. I think what happens is you build the idea up in your head and you have high expectations then it turns out that the person is just a man and you're disappointed!!

It's easier said than done but take it from someone who finally made decision a few months ago it works! (About 24 hours later I ran into an old friend on growlr that I hadn't seen in years, we had lunch on the Monday and were coupled up by that evening)
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# 9 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 15:19
 
 
Someone said :

Happy sigh or sad sigh. ?

Happy.
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# 10 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 19:49
 
 
Someone said :

Happy.

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# 11 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 19:54
 
 
Someone said :
What about wearing a fancy hat on one of your dates? Nothing too out there but something to really make your outfit *POP*.

*titter*

Just go out to all the social things that interest you - scene and non-scene. Keep going, make friends, rinse and repeat.
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# 12 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 21:11
 
 
Do you go out to clubs and pubs like the Dragon or Front Lounge or the George,, maybe if you might meet someone nice when out and about. Good luck to you anyways Lee,, Dont give up.
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# 13 : Friday 21-12-2012 @ 22:15
 
 
Someone said :
Hi a few months ago I posted a topic re meeting new gay people as friends and since than I have joined http://www.meetup.com/dublin-international-gay-social/ with several great meets and had organised my 1st one last Thurs 13th of Dec..

Its all well and good - I have tried MH, gaydar, this site - nites out on the town.. I have had a few funny dates and meets - a friend said I should write a book .. but nothing real, no connection or them just wanting sex...

is there some where out there where I havent tried... I am hoping you can help that meet up group is great for friends... but hoping some in Gaireland might know of something amazing about dating ... that I havent tried...

cheers

lee

nothing real, no connection.

That's just the way it goes.
This isn't 1970s heterosexual Ireland.
Back then, men got into relationships with women who they hoped would marry them so that they would be guaranteed sex for the rest of their lives.
In modern homosexual Ireland, we are already guaranteed sex for the rest of our lives so sexual attraction (and getting on reasonably well) alone isn't a reason to get into a "relationship" with someone.
The truth is that very few people actually fall in love genuinely.
Very few people meet their soul mate/perfect match.
That is just Hollywood nonsense.
Most of the people that you know who are in relationshits - it is a major struggle a lot of the time, but they have made the decision that it is preferable for them to put up with the struggles than to have to endure the stigma and loneliness?? of being single .
In the heterosexual world, having children is a fantastic distraction from the fact that your partner isn't actually your perfect match/soul mate.
You can get through around 25 years if you spread your kids' births across ten years.
In the homosexual world the 2 members of the relationship don't have the distraction of naturally occurring offspring so it is more difficult to make relationships last.
These days, (especially in the homosexual world) people don't search for the person who will have sex with them for the rest of their lives.
If a connection/chemistry happens then meet that person again until that chemistry/connection is gone.
If both people like each other's company then you will continue to spend time with each other regardless of what you are looking for.

Focus on being happy with yourself.
Live your life as if you will never have "another half".
Be a full person on your own.
If you are lucky enough to meet someone who makes you happier than your fully fulfilled self, then spend time with that person.
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# 14 : Saturday 22-12-2012 @ 13:41
 
 
I have this problem too...so I've just resigned myself to being single forever
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# 15 : Saturday 22-12-2012 @ 16:40
 
 
i am very happy in my career and in life in general - its been a very good recession earning and saving more than I have ever done - the only piece of the puzzle left to fit in is the parthner/relationship

Lots of ppl say when u stop looking - it will happen but if you not looking how can you see?

Iner R - 1970s what u on about ur 32 ur born 1980 - were boths 80s children as for sex ... its meaniliess and pointless with some one who u dont have conncection with, its more fulfilling - i do understand where your coming from x
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