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If Ireland Was A Person?
 
# 1 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 15:46
 
 
If Ireland was a person, what would that person be like? If you had to condense every aspect and attribute of Ireland into one person, who would they be? Would they be Male/Female? What type of personality? age? illnesses? where would they live? who are their friends? what job would they have?


Mary enjoys sex and the city, wkd blue, nights out with the girls, online bingo and ruining lives.
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# 2 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 16:20
 
 
Yer one from Fair city that owns the restaurant 🍴.
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# 3 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 16:21
 
 
A female, high on drugs and off her trolley?
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# 4 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 16:24
 
 
and who said Gaire had absolutely no sense of humour?
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# 5 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 17:06
 
 
They would be a 45 year old male who has achieved nothing and doesn't feel the need to improve themselves beyond the short term. He is a perpetual gambler, who is bad at maths. Spends all their money on the flashy new thing (as seen on tv) that breaks on the first use. He lives in a house he can't afford, complains that he can't afford it but won't move as that would take effort. His friends bitch about him behind his back but say "aww but aren't you the greatest" just enough to inflate his ego that he'll walk into the swishes party in his old suit and stained shit and think that everyone is looking at him because he is going places when really they just feel pity.
If you checked his cupboard you wouldn't find a fruit or veg, his diet consists of fast food and cheap beer.
He drives a 2010 saloon, that looks pretty but the engine has seen better days.
He grumbles that everything is so expensive but will buy it anyway (even though he doesn't need it)
He only volunteers if he can be seen to volunteer, it's all about appearances with him.
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# 6 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 17:09
 
 
Leave the farmers alone, they try their best!
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# 7 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 17:20
 
 
If Ireland was a person it would have pretty low self esteem.
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# 8 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 17:30
 
 
If anyone is familiar with the Facebook group Oh My God What a Complete Aisling then they will find Ireland personified in there.
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# 9 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 17:31
 
 
Fat but friendly.
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# 10 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 17:34
 
 
Someone said :
They would be a 45 year old male who has achieved nothing and doesn't feel the need to improve themselves beyond the short term. He is a perpetual gambler, who is bad at maths. Spends all their money on the flashy new thing (as seen on tv) that breaks on the first use. He lives in a house he can't afford, complains that he can't afford it but won't move as that would take effort. His friends bitch about him behind his back but say "aww but aren't you the greatest" just enough to inflate his ego that he'll walk into the swishes party in his old suit and stained shit and think that everyone is looking at him because he is going places when really they just feel pity.
If you checked his cupboard you wouldn't find a fruit or veg, his diet consists of fast food and cheap beer.
He drives a 2010 saloon, that looks pretty but the engine has seen better days.
He grumbles that everything is so expensive but will buy it anyway (even though he doesn't need it)
He only volunteers if he can be seen to volunteer, it's all about appearances with him.

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# 11 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 19:25
 
 
Someone said :
Fat but friendly.

LOL
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# 12 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 19:37
 
 
Someone said :
If anyone is familiar with the Facebook group Oh My God What a Complete Aisling then they will find Ireland personified in there.

that page is hilarious
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# 13 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 20:17
 
 
She's 36 and lives in a ghost estate in Portlaoise renting out the box room to her younger sister who's also her best friend to help pay her boom time mortgage. She's forever on a diet but never looses weight and doesn't know why, she only treats herself on weekends and during Eastenders. Her body aches for a baby but she hasn't had a boyfriend in like forever. She got hepatitis B from a chicken kebab in Turkey a few years ago so she has a slight yellow tinge to her skin that no amount Max factor foundation will get rid of and her Moroccan fuck buddy, Ali thinks she smells like milk.

She studied Social Studies in Athlone RTC with dreams of becoming a psychologist but failed 2nd year from full time partying and now is a secretary to a doctor and loves nothing more than going through her neighbours medical files.

She has all the box sets of Sex and the City, Kilanaskuddy and Ballykissangel and enjoys nothing more than a few bottles of weight watchers chardonnay on a saturday night and hitting Egan's nightclub with the girls for a dance. Ali pops over after the chipper closes for a ride.

She's 4 months pregnant with twins but doesn't know yet. Ali's not the father.
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# 14 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 20:55
 
 
He has 12 pairs of socks ( one for each month ) and is a lifelong member of the Foster and Allen fan club, Fianna Fáil, GAA and the legion of Mary.
He goes to Dublin every time there's a rugby international, checks into Jury's Inn as Seán Murphy and pays €150 to a junkie prostitute for the ride.He doesn't do it for the Autumn internationals as he's attending a novena for the month of the Holy Souls.
Oh, and he once shook hands with Charlie Haughey.
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# 15 : Thursday 4-9-2014 @ 21:33
 
 
Ireland as a person is Edina from Ab Fab

Label obsessed
Overweight
Not really able to look after her children
Not really able to look after her parents
Shite at relationships
Unable to really manage a business
Drinks too much

Yet somehow manages to muddle through on a mixture of self delusion and luck
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