With age comes sense !!
The only way to Avoid repeating, copying or over- compensating is to acknowledge the behaviour that occurred .
I'm now in my late 50's and my own children are addressing their own emotional baggage as a result of a lot of my past behaviour .
The key to us al, moving forward was being able to sit down and discuss it properly It's not easy and requires complete honesty from everyone .
It's very easy to blame others ( yes I've been guilty ) but oftentimes emotional baggage is a circle that can't be broken because it's easier to play the victim than accept that parents etc were at some stage victims themselves ( hence the circle ) .