PLEASE NOTE I WILL NOT REPLY TO PROFILES WITHOUT FACE PICS . I am a 59 year old very sexy transvestite I love to chat with gg's men or couples
reasontly I was asked about "my Story" so I think it is only right that I explain. As a very young person I was discovered as a CD by a verry manipulating person, As I thought that I was the only one in the world (gee was i wrong) I was extreemly worried of exposure. Then under fear and I suppose blackmail I was like so many other children groomed and subsequently raped and abused. As part of my therapy to deal with these issues I was advised to write down my experiences. As I believe that these events happened so long ago and that neither money nor jail would bring me any solus I decided to enhance story to the kind of outcome that I think I would have liked so whilst 95% of what you read is true some facts names and types of locations have been altered mostly to protect my identity. where I was born and lived in dublin city centre is full of iconic locations which would be easily identified by the reader.
my first glimpse of life as a crossdresser came at the early age of 4.for reasons unknown to me i became interested in my mothers underwear. all that silk and corsetry fascinated me. at night i would eagerly go to bed and when all in the house was quiet i would go to my mothers special drawer and remove her stockings bra suspender belt and slip. quietly in the privacy of my bedroom i would dress. just for a while at first and then return them. one night i fell asleep wearing these lovely underwear and woke to see my mother standing over me screeming. she could not understand what was happening and she blamed herself for my abnormal behavior reasoning that had she not driven my father away then i would have had a male influence and that this behavior would not have occured. years later i would discover that my father had left to start a life with an other lady and that my mother was avictim not the cause of his departure. I stopped dressing because i think i must have felt that i was hurting my mother but the desire was still there. my mother passed away when i was 6 and my desire to dress reignited and would be the cause of me being moved from one foster family to another.
My father leaving and my mother dying where pivotal and very traumatic and upsetting times in my life. being moved from one home to another didn't help either. my "problem" was always the reason for my moves and i guess i did not realy have the skills of deception that were needed to keep my secret. puberty brought about many changes the best of which was a move to a foster home 40 miles outside dublin. a middle aged couple who needed money and who acted more like landlords were just what i needed. now suddenly i could have privacy and none of the trappings that go with over protective parents. actualy the fact that they realy did not care meant that i didn't cause any problems so we actualy got on quite well. school however was a diferent story i never realy fitted in football and stuff wern't realy my thing and reading fashion mags was definitely going to get you into trouble in testerone filled school. i became a loner wandering around but very happily in my own little world.
Secondary schoolbrought new freedoms for me firstly i could walk to and from school and secondly i could leave school at lunchtime, being a loner not interested in sport this was for me was a real bonus.I liked going for walks abd being on my own, it gave me time to enter into my fantasy world and to remember those nights in my mums silk lingerie. my new parents had been tipped off about my "little habbit". so all my new mums stuff was locked away. i didnt care from what i could see she had bad taste.i spent my days looking at magazines or newspapers especialy the ones with adds for silk stockings. i must have been about 15 cause i was in the middle of my intercert exams when on one of my walks through the local park when i found a lovely silky pink nightie and panties. they were in an old ruin of a house which had been crumbling down for years. when i found them my heart jumped and my entire body started to tingle. i had a paper bag in my pocket and i tried to wrap them in that so that i could take them home. but the bag was to small and i was afraid somebody would see what i had. in my excitement i decided to masturbate, a quick scan of the area revealed that only a man and his dog were in the park and they were a good distance away. trousers round my ankle penis in hand and holding this lovely pink nightie i rubbed myself until with eyes closed i shot my hot creamy cumm into the silky nightie. gasping for breath and shaking with fear and excitement i threw the the nightie to the ground and pulled up my pants and ran. You know when you have done something scary or dangerous or very exciting. you constantly recall it think back over the event all that led up to it how wonderful it felt and how you just got away with itand of course you will never do anything like that again. Well we all know that thats not what happens. Just Like wearing my mums lingerie somethings become compulsive and of course the more dangerous the event is the more exciting it becomes. So it was with me. Tht evening and the entire next morning in school were completely taken up with thoughts of what i had done. like a moth drawn to the light, when the lunchtime bell rang I was off, running at great speed towards the old park. The old park was a couple of fields donated to the village by the owners of the old manor house. as parks go it wasn't much of one, no playground or football pitch so it was realy only used as a walking area for dogs. It was surrounded by trees and one or two houses and there was a small farm gate of an entrance. as i approached the gate i looked around very carefuly. I tried to listen but my heart was pounding with excitement. I couldn't see anyone so i walked casualy through the field up to the old ruin of a cottage still looking and listening for any sign of life but there was none. so i dashed inside the crumbling walls and to my amazement it was still there my beautyfull pink silky slip within flash my trousers were around my ankles and my little throbbing penis was hardening in the fresh breezy air. Cupping my cock i slowly rubbed it with the pink nightie and within seconds my eyes were closed and i was off in fantasy world of stockings and lace and gorgeous see thru slips and whoooosh what an orgasm i must have spurted three or four times. Once more a little fear engulfed me had anyone seen me was i alone, after a quick wipe of my cock and tearing my pants back on i scanned the area for activity. I could see no one, so i wrapped up my prize possesion placed it carfully behind a stone and left. I was so happy skipping along that i barely noticed the the gentleman and his dog pass me at the entrance to the park.
The weather was mild that month and so i took pleasure everyday in visiting my secret place in the old park.the weather in ireland is always good when the exams are on, its gods way of a little joke. students are stuck in studying and the sun is burning up outside. And gues what the minute there over then down comes the rain 1973 was no different to any year that had gone before or since. You might have thought that i would be depressed with this situation well you would be wrong because for once i had a a hobby that took me out of the house and the worse the weather the less likely that i would be interupted. every day sometimes twice a day i would visit my special place. the more you do something the more confident you get. the more confident you get the more careless you become. And so it was for me, the rain had stopped and out i went down to the park through the field straight into the old ruin dropped the trousers closed my eyes and started to masterbate. "I need somebody to walk my dog" I nearly jumped out of my skin "jesus eh what" i shouted panickly " I need you to walk my dog". I couldn't see the speaker clearly because I was temporarily blinded by the sunlight behind him.I dropped the nightie and grabbed the tops of my pants. "Sorry" I said. "i live in that house over there, call tomorrow at 11" and as quick as he came he dissapeared, to say i shit myself was not a lie, panic was all around me what will he do did he see who is he and why does he want me to walk his dog.
Mr Sanji, was a well known business man and he lived in the big house beside the park. He owned a number of businesses in the area, but still managed to remaina private person his hotel was the main watering hole for all the locals and a big source of employment in the town. He was also supposed to have hotels in Britain, biut for all his wealth he lived modestly and alone. I didnt sleep at all that night, what would he do would he tell did he see oh my god what will i do. i decided the best course of action was to run away, with the decision made i at last found peace and fell asleep. the next morning i awoke at just after 10, for the first few seconds i was contented with my plan but as i started to anylise in the cold light of day, well the strategy fell apart. well what would someone of my age do i have no money no job and my exams are still on. so i decided i would do as mr Sanji had requested. I would go to his house at 11. The driveway up is long and gravelly, i tried to walk quietly but the crunching stones under my feet gave my pressence away. There he stood at the fromnt door "come in" I followed through the hall and into the kitchen, this is "jason" my labrador she needs three miles every day I will pay you fifty pence per day to walk her, this is her lead and its kept in this drawer here is a key to the back door. When you return put water in her bowl put the lead in the drawer and leave by the back door locking it agreed he asked. "Yes" i replied. "Well of you go i will leave your money on the table, I will not be here when you return, in fact i am away for a week, ok. "Yes Mr sanji thank you". "three miles every day ok".
every morning i went to mr sanji house and took jason for his walk, the weather was good and we enjoyed the time together. In the afternoon i would go to my special place where i would masturbate to my hearts content safe in the knowledge that my little pleasure was still a secret, or so i thought. They say that familiarity breeds something anyway I began to get very comfortable in Mr Sanji house. when i would leave jason back i would get him some foodfrom a can and water and stuff and while he was eating i would go for a wander. Mr Sanji had a big house with lots of rooms and lots of pictures on the walls. most of them where of prety asian gurls with him. I have to say i found the guirls very atractive and they realy seemed to like him. they had lovely skin very smooth and beautyful mkeup red lips and short skirts. i spent alot of time looking at them, i found this realy strange because i wasnt realy interested in any irish girls. i think what i real loved was there clothes. the week flew by and jason was exhausted, my exams were finished and i was looking forward to my birthday and a long hot summer. mr sanji returned and he told me that he did not require my services ahgain for at least a week, "i will be in touch thank you you did a good job". I wasnt that bothered yeah i would miss the routine and i loved jason, but now i could spend alot more time in my favourite place. Or so I thought. Every time I went to the park Mr Sanji was there playing with jason, and even if I went early he would arive. I dont think i masturbated once that week I was as horny as hell and it was killing me. On Friday morning I decided to get up early partly because i had the biggest erection ever and oh how i missed my lovely pink slip. I ran towards the park in through the gate and down towards the old ruin, I could not believe my eyes, there he was playing with his dog, "helo, just the man" he said "11 o clock this morning come to the house i have a job for you.
Oh no I thought as i walked up the drive way to mr sanji house. i want to play with myself not his bloody dog. I loved jason but please the pleasure of my silky pink satin slip was far more appealing, especialy now that I hadnt seen it for a weekevery time i thought about it i got an erection and sometimes i think my dick sprung to life cause it thought id forgotten about it. as i walked towards the house, i decided to that i would have to stop because the erection in my pants was not only painfull but it was very obvious. i stalled for a bit started to flood my mind with anything else i could think of, it worked erection subsided just as i got to the door. i rang the bell and a few minutes later Mr sAnji opened it come on in he said, I dutifully followed wondering to myself "what does he want me to do". "when I was away did you wander around my house" he asked authoratively. "No" I mumbled in shock at the question. this way he ordered I followed up the stairs. at the top was an open door into a room that looked out over the back of the house, it was a big window and you could see all over the neighbouring fields and the Park. come in I want to show you something. the room was sparce a table a wardrobe and i could see a bed and a arm chair, it was a warm but verry large room. he beckoned me towards the window asking me to tell him what i could see. As I pointed out the fields and the barns and the park I heard him open the wardrobe I turned to see but he said go on tell me what else. i said more fields, do you see the ruin in the park he asked still behind me. I said I did and then as my body began shake with fear at what was coming next he said. you go there alot you have a little secret there, and I am worried that others will find your little secret. at this stage i hoped the ground would swallow me up, i felt myself shrinking. he continued its not safe there so I want you to use this room that way no harm will come to you, you can walk my dog in return. as he walked out the door he said there is a set of keys for the house he threw them on the bed and closed the door. i turned the wardrobe was open and hanging there was my beautyful pink slip, it was now clean and had a lovely fragrance, my prick nearly jumped out of my trousers.
Like a rabbitt frozen in the head lights i stood there shaking. what should i do what did he mean how did he find out what does he want. thousands of things went through my mind, but still my cock remained erect. it was pointed directly at the pink slip. it pushed me towards it till i could reach out and touch it. they say a standing cock has no concience and there right. as quick as a flash my trousers were down and before you could say "wank" i was coming squirting and spurting i thought id never stop. it went everywhere. I was so embaressed that i pulled up my trousers and ran down the stairs and out the door. I ran down the drive way with Mr Sanji words ringing in my ear "10 oclock tomorrow walk the dog". I spent the rest of the day thinking, all kinds of thoughts went through my mind but one thing kept on coming back to me Mr Sanji had never done me harm in fact he always looked after me. Everybody else gave out to me my foster parents moaned all the time, the social worker gave out to me as did all my teachers. I made up my mind this was the summer hols and i was going to enjoy myself. I would walk jason and get money and i could play with my lovely silk slip. this was going to be the best summer ever. the next morning 10am i went to the house rang the bell and Mr Sanji opened the door, he didnt say anything he just smiled handed me the keys and jasons lead. i put the lead on the dog and went for the walk. when i returned we went in the back door, i got jason a drink and i walked into the hall mr sanji was reading his paper in the siiting room, "I left you a present in your room" he said without looking up. I was shy and mumbled thank you as i slowly went up the stairs. i opened the door and lying on the bed neatly set out was a little white bra, a white silk slip, suspender belt, white silky pabties and the most beautyful pair of nylon stockings.
Life just couldnt get any better. I now had a job I had something to do every day and best of all I could now dress in silky underwear. I loved my little bra and my stockings after a few days Mr sanji left me a pair of high stilletos and he encouraged me to walk around the house, making me do jobs like getting his tea and hoovering I felt wonderful. He encouraged me to let my hair grow, now this caused problems at home as my foster parents wanted me to get it cut. The rows got so bad that my social worker was called in. We reached an agreement that suited all, my lazy social worker convinced my parents that i was not that bad and anyw ay all the kids wore long hair, but i would have to get it cut when i returned to school in september. I was now 17 and as i was adopted once i reached 18 i could do whatever i liked. Mr Sanji was annoyed when i told him i would have to get it cut before going back to school, he said he would think of something, he also said that he wanted me to work afternoons in the hotel. In fact he said that i was to go there tomorrow afternoon, my general manager Miss hudson will interview you. the following morning i took jason for his walk and returned to the house as usual got dressed into my sexy lingerie and started to brush a carpet when Mr Sanji called me into his study. He had magazines on his desk magazines of asian girls rather like the pictures on his walls. but these girls where naked or wearing lingerie like mine and they looked gorgeous I was facinted. "what do you think" he enquired "arent they beautyful" . I was facinated picture after picture of lovely girls with big tits and dicks. " you are like them he said " yes " i replied breathlessly. " you would like tits like her wouldnt you?. "Yes please". go on take the magazine upto your room and have a wank, but first I want you to take a little pill for me it will help you grow big tits. you must take one every day he said but I realy was not listening my hand was in my pants and my eyes were glued to the pictures.
At the time i didnt know the term"grooming" but I knew deep down that I was being prepared for something. Mr Sanji hadnt laid as much as a finger on me, he hardly even looked at me. looking back I think he was wrestling with his demons. for me i can truthfully say that i was very much in love with him. every minute of every day thats what i wished to spend with him. I knew about homo's (as we called them) and what they did but this was different because in my heart and in my mind i was a girl, so when he showed me the pictures in the magazine and tolled me that i was a girl like them, that was it for me at long last someone had recognised me for what i am a girl. at that moment i vowed to give myself to him, because he was the only person who recognised me for what i was.
life went on with the normal patern and I was happy and content the summer was coming to an end and the awful words were uthered "back to school". My body was changing my hair was thicker and not that i ever realy needed to but shaving was now becoming a distant memory. my nipples were much bigger and very sore and they were starting to protrude and become noticeble, I was starting to panic, effeminite boys dont last to long in a male school. My social worker arranged to meet completely out of the blue, that made me even more panicier than ever. She sat me down with my foster parents and explained that after my 18th birthday all responsability transfered to myself she assured me that she would always be there for me but that all funding for my foster parents would cease and that they could no longer afford to keep me. I listened intently, this was not what i thought they were going to say, the social worker went on explaining that she had spoken a Mr Sanji who employed me in his hotel and that he was offering to take me on immediately as a trainee hotel manager, the social worker then said that i should realy consider this even though it would mean not going back to school. She also explained that I would have to live on the hotel premises and that I would be sent to England and France for further training. my jaw dropped and i jumped with delight, I swear my tits grew a few centimeters I was so happy all my dreams had come through.
I was sent for a fomal interview with Mr sanji general manager a stern tall lady in her forties. Mr sanji had insisted that I go wearing my stockings knickers and braand that i put my high heels and slip in a bag and carry it with me, this was an obedience test, he told me i was to do whatever anyone asked of me that day and that i was to return to him immediately after the interview. miss Mundy was also very distinctive tall and slim with black hair she always wore black suits over silk blouses the skirt was always tight with a slit up the back seamed stockings black stillettos and pillar box red lipstick and nail varnish. She had a formidable reputation with the staff. Sam was her secretary a young girl she wore flowery dresses always short she had lovely blonde hair. everywhere that mundy went sam was sure to follow. I sat in her office looking around at all the pictures on the wall a lot of them were simmilar to Mr sanji pictures. miss mUndy went through all the questions education what i was interested in etc, Sam took notes, giggling sometimes. Miss Mundy stared at her and sam stopped keeping her head down she continued to take notes, once or twice she smilled shyly at me. The interview was coming to an end when she talked about the uniform I would have to wear a white shirt with a tie and black trousers. I had no problem with that and said so. she stood up and said that she would look forward to working with me and that i should wear my hair down not in a pony tail, slightly shocked i loosened the tie and released my hair. Her hands reached out and started to flick it into shape around my face, sam arrived back in with the uniform and laid it on the desk. "what do you think" she said, "will it fit you". Miss Mundy lent forward again "take your shirt off and lets see". the blood drined from my face and body, I was wearing a bra I hesitated. Miss Mundy lent forward again "that was an order you must be obedient". I slowly undid my buttons turning my back i removed my shirt. Sam started giggling I got all embaresed. I was asked to turn around Mis Mundy was smilling sam had her hand over her mouth. " you have little tits my darling said Miss mundy "trousers take them off". You are a lovely little girl isn't she sam, Sam nodded still with her hand over her mouth. sam you should have got her a skirt, not trousers take your heels out of your bag and your slip and lets see you wear them. I obeyed Miss mundy got a hair brush and started to brush my hair. THey made me sit down and they produced makeup within 20 miniutes I was unrecognisable I looked like a little model. then they put a trench coat on me buttoneed up the front and led me through the hotel and out to miss mundies car. tHey drove me back to mr sanji house where he was waiting for me in a silk dressing gown. life was about to change the grooming was over, his demons where set aside from now on i would be his servant his whore his plaything.
Miss mundy had a key and she opened the front door. We went into the sitting room Mr Sanji was sitting in his arm chair wearing a lovely silk dressing gown. for the first time i saw his naked well tanned legs. In the middle of the room was a timber bench nicely varnished a funny shape rather like a rocking horse. he stared at me and as he did sam unbottoned my coat. removing it she walked away. He kept staring at MIss Mundy put some music on the record player some classical piece she removed her jacket and her skirtand her blouse, she was wearing all black underwear, with her hair flicked back she moved behind me. sam had also removed her dress she had frilly underwear, which miss mundy ruffled for her as she moved passed her. sam took my hands and smiled she put leather straps around my wrists and then my ankles when she was finished. Miss Mndy asked Mr Sanji was this young bitch going to be his whore his slave his plaything. He replied that she was. Will you take her now Mundy demanded. I will with tha sam took my hands and led to the timber horse like thing she made bend over and tied the straps on my wrists to the handles at the front at this stage she pulled them tight bringing my head right down to about hip level as she did so she whispered it wont be to bad. My knees where then strapped in under my stomach and my ankles slightly below my knees. I felt her at my pants which she cut a hole in. My cock was now harder than it had ever been and it was squashed under me. i felt sams hand on my bottom and at the same time i could see mr sanji stand up in front off me. miss mundy opened his gown from behind and there right in front of me was his cock. I had never seen one except my own but this was bigger longer and thicker with his hand on my head he gently placed in on my lips. "lick it he commanded i closed my eyes and started to lick, he pushed into me my lips parted and he thrust inside my mouth. I gasped for airas his cock slid up and down my throat I couldnt move but i felt like i was going to vommit, then crack Miss mundy smacked my bottom and roared at me "you dirty little slut how dare you come to work wearing panties and with that she ripped them off.
I tried to scream but his cock was down my throat, when he pulled back i gasped for air but it was only for a split second and each thrust went further down my throat, his hands firmly held my head in position. My eyes started to water and saliva and precumm filled my mouth. Miss Mundy continued to slap my bottom. the pain and the gagging were very exciting and my hard cock was now spewing precum underneath me. H e stopped and withdrewand i panted for breath Sam brought a glass of wine she had put a straw in it "drink are you ok" "yes " I smilled back. Mundy had stopped spanking me but i could feel hands on my bottom and something goooey and cold. miss mundy had now moved in front of my face and sam had put a high stool in font of me for her to sit. The massaging of my bottom continued.
THey had obviosly planned what they effectionately called my "Bitching" ceremony, they had lots of wine and food to gorge on and they were taking thier time. I sipped more wine as MMMr Sanji massaged my bottom his hands were wonderful they were soft yet strong, big and educated they were teasing my man pussy. The cold vaseline squelched in his fingers and his fingers pressed against my hole. Miss Mundy stood up and sam who was kneeling beside her holding the wine glass up for me smilled as she put down the glass and started to lower mundy's pantieswhen she had lowered them around her ankles miss mundy sat back into the stool for the first time i saw a pussy and it was barely 6 inches from my mouth her hands were sloewly moving up her stockings towards her pussy and as they reached the top of her legs they slid down between them parting them and exposing her wet cunt, so engrossed withis new experience that i failed to sense Mr Sanjis hands moving around my hips. one hand came away as the other strenghtened its grip, he was now using his free hand to control his cock which he was pressing against my hole. Reality dawned as Mundy closed her legs and urged Mr Sanji "fuck the bitch" she cried. his cock was now pressingagainst my hole and his free hand now grasped my other hip i was in a vice like grip unable to move unable to resist as she screemed again at him he moved slowly deciseivly into my pussy I screamed with pain put he kept pushing deeper and harder inside me. I wanted to shite I thought my hips had cracked the pain was terrible and he was brutal he laughed and panted Mundy screamed shes a virgin look theres blood my hole was torn. he put more vaseline on his dick and kept going in and out of me " you will get used to it he said you will grow to love it . Sam was holding my head and I was crying. he was fooking me real hard now she kept telling me to relax. Mundy roared Ill give the little bitch something to help her relax and with that she pushed the high stool under my face and sat into it with her two hands she forced my mouth onto her pussy lifted her legs and wrapped them around my mouth. Sam tillted her stool back so that my mouth was now full of pussy.
to be continued......